Attending the event in 2024 were, from left: Kari Gladney, Deborah Hendricks, Tim Polakowski, Carolyn Imel, Joel Imel.
By Dennis Bova
MONARCH GRIEF CENTER’S third annual Sunset Soiree will be late this month, and while it will be joyous and festive, its underlying goal is one of seriousness and comfort to those who have lost a loved one.
The event also will mark a year of growth for the nonprofit counseling center in Perrysburg that has added space, staff, and support groups.
“When people think of a grief center,” said Tim Polakowski, Monarch’s cofounder, executive director, and grief counselor, “they think we’re only holding the hand of someone who lost their longtime spouse.” He said, while that indeed is a serious loss, “what people don’t realize is that we are also seeing people who have experienced miscarriages, stillbirths, toddlers who have died, kids who have died, young adults with cancer, car accidents, heart attacks, suicides. We’re working with a lot of losses.”
Monarch began in early 2023 to fill a niche in grief counseling. Amy Rowe, the other cofounder and grief counselor, said, “Some work was being done in hospice organizations, churches, and hospital systems that had grief support groups. Those groups are typically very general. You could have a 30-year-old woman who lost her preteen son to suicide in the same room as an 85year-old man who lost his wife of 60 years to cancer. While both are grieving, their grieving is different.”
Polakowski and Rowe built on their experiences as social workers at a local hospice to develop Monarch, bringing a new emphasis on how to help those who grieve.
Through Monarch, Polakowski and Rowe added specialized groups to fill the need of those grieving across a spectrum of losses.
“Just as you go to your primary physician with a heart issue, then are sent to a specialist,” Rowe explained, “we’re the specialist for those dealing with grief.”
Polakowski explained that grief counseling is not about mental health, because unlike those who suffer from mental health disorders, “there’s nothing wrong with you when you’re grieving. Grieving is a normal human experience.”
To meet an increasing clientele, Monarch has grown. From one suite, at 314 Louisiana Avenue in Perrysburg, Monarch has expanded into two adjoining suites.
“That allowed us to open a room for children and teens, with comfortable chairs and a table to play games or do crafts while we talk, and shelving for toys and books,” Rowe said. Monarch is seeing more youths, ages 5 and up, in general because its overall clientele growth.
Monarch also added to its staff. With only Polakowski and Rowe at the beginning, there now are nine other professionals “who come with an array of grief, bereavement, hospice, death/dying, and related experience and skills,” Rowe said. There also now is a part-time social media/communications expert and a part-time office assistant.
New support groups are available: loss of an adult child, loss to suicide, and loss for those in the LGBTQ+ community. These are in addition to the groups tending to the needs of later-life and mid-life spousal loss, and addiction overdose.
“We’ve also done some outreach, like going to schools and organizations and companies who have experienced a loss,” Rowe said. In these cases, Monarch tends to the needs of the crisis counselors – helping the helpers.
“We pull from all counties in Northwest Ohio,” she said. “It’s not uncommon for folks to drive an hour to us because there are no other such centers near them in outlying areas.”
Monarch accepts Medicare, Medicaid, and other forms of major insurance, but realizes that not all have insurance and that others may have high deductibles. “One of our founding principles,” Rowe said, “is that we don’t want finances to be a burden. Our mission is to provide support to those who are grieving.”
This is where the Sunset Soiree comes in, on Saturday, Sept. 20, beginning at 5:30 p.m. It’s a fundraiser for the Monarch Fund, for clients in need of financial assistance. As in the past two years, this year’s event will be at the Perrysburg Boat Club, featuring a pianist and a steel drum band–both from the Toledo School for the Arts–a silent and live auction, grazing tables, and an open bar. Revenue comes from sponsors, the auctions, and ticket sales. Details are at monarchgriefcenter.org/soiree.
Returning to Monarch’s core, Polakowski said, “Profound grief takes a long time. People need somewhere they can come on a prolonged basis to check in how they feel. Everyone grieves differently.”
As for Monarch and its mission, he said, “We’re in it for the long haul.” ✲
