Back in the day, church services began with loss and lament.
…The church of my youth also feasted.
We sang those praises. We too were grateful.
But that praise and that gratefulness was weighted with a heavy history burdened with great pain and great fairness.
Before we could offer songs of praise and appreciation, or feast, or fellowship, we had to remind one another of all the reasons we were so very, very grateful in the first place.
And we had to allow a time to weep for all that had been taken and was still being taken.
+ Marcie Alvis Walker, author
OH MY! WHERE TO BEGIN my reflection on the past year since last Thanksgiving Day? As I write this article I can only hope and pray that some sense and sensibility come to those who perpetrate such horror and atrocities on other human beings. How do these stem from religious connections or at least get attributed to centuries of religious conflict?
Marcie Alvis Walker, quoted here, gives me a place to begin to reach for a sense of gratitude in these difficult times in our major institutions, in our history, and in our world. I too have experienced church services beginning with loss and lament from childhood.
Wakes and funerals were part of the Roman Catholic rituals especially during school time when we got out of class to sing at the funeral of a parishioner. We attended wakes and funerals of family members and friends even when we were children. It was just part of the learning experience of facing loss and sadness, the realities of real life. I must admit that illness and death in my circle of family and friends is nothing like the terror and harshness that I’ve lived to see in my later years.
Many people I knew who were grieving seemed to overcome their grief and eventually began to join us for various activities and celebrations and even seemed to have reached a place of peace, gratitude, and even joy. I also know people who never seem to get out of the loss and lament, and I can only support them with my prayers and visits and make room for them in my life as best I can. I also found over my lifetime that I, myself, can only bear a certain amount of grief and sadness and need to reach really deep into my soul to keep from being overwhelmed by the sadness I see in the world. There are times when I cannot watch the news on TV and go visit a friend instead where we can share our lives in some way.
So how does grief help me reach a sense of gratitude during the difficult times? Grief does indeed often precede gratefulness almost every time I attend a celebration in my religious tradition. We Catholics, and many Christians, remember the difficult times in our lives and in our world whenever we come together to share in a worship service. Some people call it confessing our sins, some call it becoming aware that we are not perfect, and others even sit in silence and block out all that distracts them from listening to the still, small voice of God. I believe that when we gather with others in a community of faith that this sharing of our losses helps us to see just how much we still have to be grateful for no matter how hopeless the situations may seem. I can only share my deep belief here that if we are to let there be peace on earth, it must begin with me. Pray for peace. Be peace to all you meet this day and every day. Shalom…Salam!
Have a blessed and peaceful Thanksgiving Day!
Sister Mary Thill is a Sylvania Franciscan Sister. She can be reached at mthill@sistersosf.org.
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